I know it's been a while since I posted on here, but today is a very special day! It's Atticus' 1st birthday!!!! I can hardly believe that it's been a whole year since Atticus was born and began his journey with HLHS. You can go back and reread his story to see what all he's been through, but today I'd like to recap just one day....the day he was born.
Robbie and I had arrived at the hospital the night before I was scheduled to be induced. When we had arrived, I had just driven across the state and then walked 3 blocks to the hospital (we'd parked at the wrong garage). When the nurses had checked me in, I was already dialated 3 cm!! They gave me some medicine to slow me back down as it was Sunday and none of the doctors that needed to be there were there that night. Thankfully Atticus was a good boy and waited until the next day.
Bright and early the next morning, the doctors started me on Pitocin (?) to induce my labor. I opted to get the epidural, which was both great and horrible. It was great because it was the first time with any of my deliveries that it worked the way it was supposed to!! I finally was completely numb! It was horrible because it took over an hour to place (they had a resident with them, and let her "learn" how), the resident ran the cath into my muscle wall (which reeeeeeeeeally hurt later), and they had to do it again. But like I said, once they were done...aaaahhhhhhhhhh. I told Robbie that if they could promise it work every time, I'd gladly have as many kids as he wanted!!! But only if!
We passed the time by watching a little morning news, some comedy, and being closely monitored by the doctors and nurses. My mom was there, Robbie-of course, and my preacher and his wife came also. That really meant a lot. Every one had just decided to go for some lunch (none for me until after the baby) and the preacher and his wife left to go get it for everyone.
The nurse came in to check my progress, looked at the machine that keeps tracks of your contractions, looked at me and said, "Are you feeling any pressure?" I replied that I was too numb, but I guessed I did feel a little bit of pressure down low. The nurse said that's what she figured and started calling everyone else to get me ready to roll into the Operating Room. (I had to deliver in the OR just in case something started to go wrong with Atticus during the delivery, and so they could hand him off to the Pediatric Cardiac Team that was waiting on the other side of the OR to evaluate him as soon as he was born.) Luckily, the preacher and his wife arrived just in time to see me being wheeled across the hallway.
Robbie got into his OR scrubs and came in with me. There were at least 10 people in there! The doctor (not at all the lady I was expecting to deliver me) told me to push, and out Atticus came! It only took 1 push!! They held him up for just a moment so I could see him, and then cut the cord, wrapped him up, and out the door he went to the other half of the OR to the awaiting team of doctors. My mom tells her version of being on the outside of the OR. She was talking with Brian and Sondra (the preacher and his wife) about how she hoped she'd get a chance to see him went, whoosh! Out they came with Atticus. It was only for a moment, as they ducked into the other room, but it was enough. They all joked that the delivery took less time than it did to get me in the OR!
I was cleaned up and wheeled back across into my room to recover from the delivery. About an hour after Atticus was born, the nurses wheeled him into my room, in an incubation unit. I couldn't hold him, but I could stick my hands in and hold his tiny hand. Thankfully, Valerie (my sister) had arrived a few minutes before with Sandy, Gideon, and Jamal (my nephew). We wanted to make sure that they all got a chance to meet Atticus, because we didn't know how the surgeries would go, and whether they would get another chance to see him. Unfortunately, he was only in there for about 5 minutes, when the heater on his unit started to short out, and they had to take him away to the NNICU (neo-natal ICU--the PCICU was full for a couple of days).
It broke my heart that he had to leave me so soon. After all, each moment was precious because I might have so few of them. I remember wanting to go see him that night, but feeling far too exhausted to go. It would be a whole week before I could hold him for the first time, on the night before his first surgery. He would already be hooked up to a ventilator and about a million monitors, but it didn't matter. The moment they placed him in my arms, I knew I never wanted to let him go. I was so afraid of what was about to happened (though, if I had known everything he'd go through then, I'd have said, "No! I'm not strong enough to handle that!"). But, you can read that story in my earlier posts.
Atticus arrived in this world on October 5, 2009 at 12:50PM. He weighed 8 lbs 15 ozs (almost 9 lbs!--and a week early!) and was 21.5 inches long. Now, a year later, God has seen fit to let Atticus not only make it through all the many complications he has had, but to thrive and flourish! He is currently about 23 lbs and about 30 inches long! Thank you all who have prayed for us, kept us in your thoughts, helped us in so many ways, and that have shared Atticus' journey to date with us. I know that he still has more to go through before we can (hopefully!) have all his surgeries behind us, but today none of that matters. God has blessed me by letting me have the chance to celebrate Atticus' 1st birthday! Thank you all again for celebrating this joyful day with us, and as always, keep on prayin'!!
